Ibunda

Dear ibu,
seperti lagu yang engkau ajarkan padaku ketika kecil
----'kasih ibu tiada tara'
engkau terus memberiku kehangatan dan kasih sayang
aku anakmu,ibu, yang begitu sangat tidak berbakti
meninggalkanmu disana, tak memperdulikan seberapa banyak doa
yang engkau lantunkan pada yang Diatas,
merindukanku agar kembali ke pangkuan mu.

aku bersyukur, ibunda.
bersyukur karena engkau mendidikku dengan teguh
menjagaku dari segala gangguan kotor di dunia hitam kelam ini
hingga saatnya aku disini, aku mengerti.
ketika kelelahan menghantuimu, hanyalah aku yang memanja untuk terus bahagia
aku bersyukur karena aku mengerti arti di balik semua itu
aku menyadari, engkau begitu berarti di hidupku
menyadari bagaimana hidup ini sebenarnya,
dan aku dapatkan itu semua ketika aku jauh darimu, ibu.
tak ada kehangatan sambutan dirumah,
tak ada tawa ceria dan manja dari suara adik kecilku
tak ada kesegaran makan malam yang selalu kudapatkan ketika aku masih dirumahmu
tak ada peluh yang tidak berarti,
dan aku mengerti, atau mungkin hampir mengerti, bagaimana tidak dipeluk engkau lagi.

bunda tercinta,
jauh darimu aku belajar mencintai
aku belajar berhadapan dengan semua orang
aku belajar menghadapi emosi sendiri
ketika aku jatuh ke jurang, engkau akan tetap selalu berada dalam surga
dengan kebahagian beritaku
engkau adalah perempuan paling berarti di dunia ini untukku
andai engkau mendengarku sekarang,
kurasakan detak suara Ramadhan dekat di telinga ku
kurasakan aku bersimpuh di telapak kakimu, meminta permintaan maafmu
atas anak tidak berbakti ini.


1.00 am by Indiallegro

today was just an ordinary day

Weather changes 2 times in a day. Sometimes its even worse (4x in a day!!--hupfffhh). That is Holland, babe. The sun this morning was killing me, it was so hootttt!! I feel like all the eyes are coming to me, thinking 'what is wrong with that girl in this 30 deg C temperatur with something covering all of her body'- thoughts.
I am so delighted. Though I am such a sinner I was saved by my headcover. I never thought I will be a minor in this major country.
I was planning to have fasting today. Fasting is primarily the act of willingly abstaining from some or all food, drink, or both, for a period of time (thanks my luvly, Wikipedia). I was just remembered that I still owe a week of fasting from Ramadha last year. Astagfirullah, and it is almost the new Ramadhan coming this years. Thus, I must to run for it this whole week.

I am not sure. I blame my self as my pms-syndrome coming over for 2 big plate of spaghetti that I ate this morning. So spesial spaghetti, or I can say its a simple and lovely spaghetti, with a corned beef and fresh green paprika in it. It kinds of delicious, actually. Not bad for a new, beginner chef. Well, actually I am not really a cooking person, It just that when I was in the highest point of my hungryness (I dont know if this word is available!) and I could not found something that I can eat, than my cooking skill will shows up and gives magic to my hand to cook something eatable (at least I never go to hospital because of the food that I make haha).

I must to wake up early morning, actually. Because I lost my PAN!
what is the relation between those two?

I will tell you later on after I really get an answer where my PAN is.
Time to dream. Time to hug.
My best and the one in the only. My Pillow >_<

2.41 am.

selamat datang~~

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Enjoooyyyy!!!!!